Sex and Death with Anneke Necro
Anneke Necro is a feminist blogger, adult performer, and filmmaker living in Barcelona. I had the pleasure of interviewing Anneke about her adorable cat Marduk for the first issue of PEGGY, but the Spanish beauty is quite an interesting character herself, so I obviously had to do another interview! Therefore I hit her up again – this time to have a little chat about necrophilia and other paraphilias.
Simone: You are an adult performer and filmmaker and you’ve made videos that cover a vide range of paraphilias and fetishes. Where do you think this interest in making art of perversions comes from?
Anneke: In my case, I am certain that the majority of my paraphilias come from the literature I consumed during my adolescence. When I started consuming porn at 14, I realized that it barely turned me on and often it even offended me, so I totally gave up porn and started to masturbate reading books from authors like Lovecraft, Sheridan Le Fanu, Edgar Allan Poe, Robert W. Chambers, and Comte de Lautréamont – along with a few works on magic and the occult. There I found what I needed to get turned on: Fantasy!
I recently listened to an interview that you did on a Spanish podcast where you talked about necrophilia. What about the relationship between sex and death fascinates you?
Death and sex are the two big taboos in our society, and crossing the line of what is deemed proper has always interested me. On the other hand, both the act of sex and the act of dying have a high energetic and spiritual charge that I like to experiment with. Much more often than a simple sexual act these experiences can be a part of a ritual or meditation.
In what way do you think necrophilia is present in your own erotic life?
This fetish is much more common than we think. For example, the myth of the vampire, Dracula – or the way vampires in movies or literature are highly sexualized characters even though they don’t stop being corpses. Movies and literature have romanticized the aesthetic of the corpse and death itself. We call the orgasm itself “La Petite Mort” and often sensuality is represented with the colors black (mourning) and red (blood). I think that death in general is very present in our imagination but in a lot of cases we struggle to acknowledge and accept it.
Do you share your interest in necrophilia with your sexual partners? For example: Have you ever experimented with necrophilia role-play or things like that?
Yes, and no one has ever judged me negatively for it, which I think is because I do it very naturally, in a way that is healthy and that does not hurt anyone. Not all of my sexual partners have wanted to explore this terrain with me, but some have found it super exciting. Normally, it has been a kind of role-play, but on occasion I’ve gone further – like having sex in cemeteries.
What’s the most erotic experience you’ve had with death?
One time, when I was working as an embalmer, we received the body of a guy my age, who was very attractive. I was alone and had to prepare it. The whole procedure of washing his body, applying make up, combing him, dressing him – It was the most erotic thing I have ever experienced.
One thing that really fascinates me about fetishes and paraphilias is that sometimes it’s such a mystery where they come from. Have you ever wondered how your interest in necrophilia began?
I think it’s because what excites me most is the darkness, everything that is occult – things that you can’t really know for certain. No one knows what it’s like to die, no one knows what happens when you die. It’s like cadavers are on a different plane from us and that not knowing where they are, not even knowing if they are really anywhere, is what creates the halo of mystery that excites me. Also, with my sexual partners there have been the experience of them staying still, without a will of their own, without being able to react to stimulation; in this case it’s more of a dominant/submissive relationship.
In media necrophiles are so often associated with criminals, which is far from always the case. Why do you think people are so uncomfortable with certain paraphilias and tend to only associate them with the most extreme cases?
People like to sensationalize. And more than anything else it’s easier to criminalize what we don’t understand instead of looking inside our heads and be sincere and honest with ourselves. To analyze what we like, what turns us on, can be a very violent and disturbing process and not everyone is capable of enduring that.
How do we become better at understanding and accepting each other’s sexual cravings?
First of all we need to accept our own fantasies. You are not a bad person because you fantasize about death, engage in BDSM, or get turned on dressing up as a kitten. We all have fetishes and fantasies. Some are more accepted and common. Others are more unusual, violent, or even contrary to our own personal ethics. To avoid frustrations and even serious psychological problems the ideal is to understand our paraphilias and work with them so that they don’t become a problem.
What else turns you on? – Do you feel your sexual desires drawn towards any other paraphilias?
I love hematophilia (sexual attraction towards blood), and I also have a lot of fetishes with objects, colors, odors, and textures… Sometimes the simple act of being seated on a chair, whose color or texture of upholstery I like, is enough. Music also influences my sexuality a lot, food turns me on a lot, being in contact with nature is what turns me on the most, paranormal experiences… I am capable of seeing sex in many things.
I once watched this video of you smashing different types of fruit – it was super hot! Also, I think I might have a thing for blood too. One of your co-workers, Erika Lust, recently released a video on XConfessions where a vampire sneaks through the window and performs oral sex on Misha Cross while she’s sleeping and on her period… Did you watch it?
Thanks – It was fun to make the short with the fruit! Yes, I have seen the video on XConfessions and I like the idea of normalizing menstruation in porn. I have some private videos of that sort that I’ve done for clients. What didn’t convince me about the short on XConfessions is that the blood doesn’t look real – otherwise it’s great.
And finally: Are you working on any interesting projects at the moment? Anything you want to reveal at this point.
Yes! I’m working on a new project with my partner – a creative lab for sexual content.
Looking forward to it. Thank you, Anneke!